1.4.23
I’ve been a little quiet lately… That last round of AC hit me a little harder. Mainly with fatigue, but also my stomach just feeling off. I’m a stubborn one though. It wasn’t bad enough to take anything extra, just enough to feel off. I am thankful that my only noticeable side effects with this chemo drug were fatigue and my mouth feeling funny. I never did get the mouth sores- however, my whole mouth feels like it has been scraped with a tongue scraper (not really sure how else to describe it). Not sure if it’s because of that or just a random side effects of chemo but my food tastes different. There’s not a lot of flavor… so if any of you have had covid and lost your taste you can sympathize a little with me now 😉 That usually lasts that first week then things start to return back to “normal.” I’m glad I’m done with this chemo drug! With my side effects getting mood noticeable with each infusion I’m not sure what I would feel like if I had to do more rounds of it!
Yesterday was a hard day for me more so emotionally than anything else. I was struggling with everything going on and just wanting things to be like they were before we noticed the lump. Before I was diagnosed with cancer. And then today‘a devotions:
Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.
Isaiah 43:18
Talk about God giving you what you need exactly when you need it! The following verse was just as encouraging to me: See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland. And if this wasn’t enough, I was reminded on Sunday that while making plans is normal It’s so easy for us to have everything planned out to a T, that we forget to take into account God’s plan. I don’t always understand the whys but I do know that God loves me more than I love myself. Sometimes that can be hard to remember. This is hard. And like I said in a previous post, sometimes I feel like a two year old throwing a temper tantrum. Wishing this was all just a bad dream. But as the saying goes: No pain. No gain. I can either use this as an opportunity to learn or I can let this make me bitter. I’m choosing to learn. To look for God in the small (and big) things. And when I‘m focused on God the other things don’t seem so big. I love how my perspective can change when I’m not focused on me.
I don’t have a lot of pictures to share this time. I was really lacking ambition this past week. However, if things progress like they have in the past I should be more back to normal this week. And I am noticing that. I’m still awake and it’s after 6pm. 🤣🙂
I am happy to say that we have survived our first week with Tucker. He is still alive. And we are still alive! Haha! If any of you have helpful tips for his puppy biting stage I’m all ears! My poor hand is taking a beating (chemo definitely hasn’t helped… my skin is so dry.) So, for your puppy viewing pleasure, a picture of our sleeping Tucker.
So sorry to hear about your rough week. I think these treatments have a cumulative effect, so it IS very good that you’re done with this one. It’s very difficult to keep a positive attitude when you are miserable physically. You are focusing on the right thing–God is always there for you–he will bring you through this.
Puppy biting is tough, I think much of it is personality. Our first German Shepherd pup Gus wasn’t bad, Eli was a nightmare. I’m sure you have chew toys. I found “bully sticks” to be helpful. They are kind of expensive, but they’re tough and last quite awhile. We even bought a soft muzzle, but then he whined a lot which is also annoying and I’m not sure it teaches them anything. It also seemed to help if I let him know he hurt me. I would scream “oww!” and do my best (pitiful) impersonation of a puppy whimper. That worked better as he got a little older. Happy to chat if you’re feeling up to it!
What an adorable picture of Tucker!!! For all their trouble I still think they are a tremendous blessing.
Thank you Kim! ❤️ Most of the time I do ok. It’s crazy how random thoughts/feelings will hit you out of the blue!
Aaron had read somewhere about “yelping” or whatever, when they bite too hard. So we’ve been doing that. Court said her bf had a pair of leather gloves that he uses to play with her puppy. We went and bought some. Makes a HUGE difference for me! I can still yelp at him if I think he’s biting too hard but at least now my hands aren’t getting torn apart. (My skin is so dry with chemo) The times I get “hurt” are when I’m trying to get something from him he shouldn’t have.. so he’s not even trying to get me, it’s the glove, or a shoe, or my sock!
Try lightly tapping the nose when he bites.